Unsettled, but Full of Hope

I am feeling unsettled lately, but not in the bad way. I can only describe it as the physical manifestations of imminent change, which doesn’t really describe anything very well. I am not having any sort of regular contractions, yet. Though I have had some doozy’s few and far apart, as well as lots of Braxton Hicks contractions. (The difference being only that one is painful, and one is just uncomfortable.) Night time seems to bring on the most discomfort, probably because I’ve been hauling my belly around all day.

Tomorrow my great friends are throwing me a baby shower. I’m super excited to just see my friends and celebrate life. And apparently there is going to be lots of chocolate and frosted carbohydratess, which is a big plus. I am honestly very thankful to my friends, who have gone out of their way to bless Riker and I. I feel very loved and honored.

Easter weekend marks the 38 week point of pregnancy for me. Baby really could come at any time. I am trying hard not to get my hopes up for an early delivery, but instead to pray that difficult prayer “Lord, let Riker come in your perfect timing.” For someone like me, it’s a constant struggle to remember that no matter how good I am at organizing, God’s plan and timing are probably (ok, definitely) the best.

My next midwife appointment is on Monday, and we’ll see what Midwife Anita says about Riker’s positioning. I haven’t gotten a sense yet that he’s turned from being posterior, but I am again trusting the Lord will turn him in time for an easy delivery. Aaron’s been telling Riker to turn, and Joanna has been talking to my back. 🙂 She hopes by talking “behind” him, he’ll turn around. I think it’s an unproven but excellent strategy!

If you would like to pray for the birth, here are the things we’ve been focusing on and praying for, and we’d love for you to pray with us!

– That Riker would be positioned for an easy, healthy delivery with no complications
– Strength and peace for me, and the ability to surrender and work with the process
– That fear would have no place in our hearts or home!
– That the birth process would be one of peace, restoration, and joy for everyone involved
– Wisdom and strength for Amber and Anita (the midwives)
– While I realize natural birth can NOT be painless, that it would be as pain free as possible
– Fast labor with no complications whatsoever
– Peace and security for Caden as we welcome little brother
– Healthy mom and healthy baby at the end of a fantastic home-birth!

– And really, you could pray it goes SUPER fast. I would totally be ok with Aaron having to catch and wait for Anita. Amber’s only 20 minutes away, so if she missed it, that would be a miracle… still though. Fast is ok. Fast and uncomplicated. 🙂

I am a big fan of praying over lists of things, as the Lord has often used this tool to remind us after the fact of his goodness towards us. So please, join us in prayer over this list, so that when I post my birth story, I can show you God’s goodness in answered prayer!

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About Jennifer James

I'm a full time mom who works full time. I'm a painter, a dreamer, and a believer that the most feminist thing you can do is adore your femininity. I say what I think, when it's appropriate for sharing. I write when I feel like I have something to say. I love always.

2 thoughts on “Unsettled, but Full of Hope

  1. In praying about our homebirth, I found this verse and it made it a lot easier to let go of the fear and allow HIS peace to rest in my heart, and trust Him for His best.
    Isaiah 8:11-14 NIV
    11 The LORD spoke to me with his strong hand upon me, warning me not to follow the way of this people. He said:
    12 “Do not call conspiracy
    everything that these people call conspiracy ;
    do not fear what they fear,
    and do not dread it.
    13 The LORD Almighty is the one you are to regard as holy,
    he is the one you are to fear,
    he is the one you are to dread,
    14 and he will be a sanctuary

    Can’t wait to hear your birth story and see pictures of little Riker. 😀 Praying a covering of peace over your hearts and home! Love you guys!!

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